BOOK CLUB REPLAYS

Welcome!  Each week We are discussing different sections of my book, i see you, i hear you, and i understand. The weekly replays will be on this page so you can use as needed.

My goal is that by the end of the four weeks you will leave feeling confident and empowered to advocate for your child to get them the supports and services they need to be successful at school. 

Take a look at what we are covering each week & then scroll down for the weekly replay, summary & feedback form!  See you next week!

Prepare yourself to be a valuable member of the IEP team

reference pages: 13-54

*live discussion on 10/18/22 
at 7:00 PM EST 

Click here to watch > week 1
Learn to present your whole child including their strengths & their vision

reference pages: 133-170

*live discussion on 10/25/22 
at 7:00 PM EST 

Click here to watch > week 2
Learn the special education cycle, process, and acronyms

reference pages: 31-132

*live discussion on 11/1/22 
at 7:00 PM EST 

Click here to watch > week 3
What to do when things go wrong

reference pages: 170-242

*live discussion on 11/8/22 
at 7:00 PM EST 

click here to watch > week 4
week 5: problem solving 
& advocacy empowerment
(part 2)
replay & summary

This week we talked about what to do when things go wrong, goals are not met, you or your child get frustrated, etc.

First it is important to have a list of who should be at the IEP table and know the roles and responsibilities of each person.

IEP Team members:

You can review the players on pages 31-54 and download the IEP Contact list & IEP binder list. Remember the players who must be at every IEP meeting include: Parent, general ed teacher, special education teacher, and school administrator.

It is recommended to print it out for every new school year. Maybe there are new teachers, professionals, etc. Who are you going to email when things go wrong? Whose name and role do you need to remember when you are at the meeting or needing specific support? You may also find it beneficial to print the IEP Checklist to help guide you on what to do before, during and after the IEP meeting.  

Roles and responsibilities: 

Student: show up and do the best they can. Hopefully they communicate with you what they are struggling with. Your child should show up at the IEP meeting in their own way. For younger children, it is beneficial to bring their picture and state what your child has expressed to you prior to the meeting.  When children are older, they can start attending the meetings. Whichever law is strongest between the Federal or State law will be what applies, so some states children can attend at 14 in some states and some are 16.

Parents: bring up your concerns and observations to the table. Your job is to push for your child's vision. Communicate with the teachers on homework and other support your child may need.

Teacher role:  Know the curriculum and grade level standards.

special ed teacher role: know how to modify the curriculum and how to provide accommodations. 
 
Sometimes it feels like the school is trying to put your child in to existing systems, but the school is supposed to design programs around your child’s needs. You can communicate with the school if it isn’t fitting or working. It is best to follow a certain chain of communication when problems arise. Your IEP contact list will help you decide who to contact and when.

Remember, you can break the relationship if you are reacting with anger or big emotions. Try to wait until you are calm unless it is something that must be responded to immediately and then follow the appropriate chain of communication. You wouldn’t necessarily want your boss to be getting the first email of frustration without talking with you first, right?  

Chain of communication for different issues:

Homework and/or classroom concerns: classroom teacher and then the special ed teacher.

Supports and services: maybe you notice certain supports aren’t helping or some needed to be added. Maybe you are noticing a pattern of resistance on certain days and trying to see if the support can be offered at a different date or time. The chain of communication is: Special ed teacher > specialist on that goal > principal/admin > special ed coordinator.

IEP plan, goals, services: goals will have to be made or adjusted in a team meeting, so be sure to schedule one when you feel it is necessary. You don’t have to wait for the next scheduled meeting to talk about things that may need to be addressed sooner. first you would contact the Special ed teacher then the special ed coordinator.  

when you get draft iep, you can accept it as full, reject as full, or reject as part. for example, you can reject a goal around writing and ask it to be re-written. maybe the school said they were going to add 3 accommodations and only added 2, you can write an email that asks/suggests something different and they can fix it and send it back without you having to formally reject it. if you do reject part of the iep, they can either change the goal and/or services and/or go back and forth to edit to an agreeable plan.  if that doesn’t happen there may be a need for a new meeting. at the meeting, they will need to show data that supports their decision for the goal or service. 

your rights and areas you may “complain” about are considered due process. 

You have rights related to: identification (identifying that your child has the disability and needs support), evaluation (whether an evaluation is done or not done), placement (where the services are being provided), FAPE (Free and Appropriate Public Education) For example, is your child with non-disabled peers if they can handle it, do they have access to the grade level curriculum with support, do they have access to extra support that may not be part of their grade level curriculum.

Substantive complaints:

Appropriate education: Are they getting science because they are in high school, or are they just doing colors because that is all they can cognitively handle?

Effective progress:  There are a lot of court cases surrounding this topic because there is so much grey area. Who’s to say the child is making effective progress?

Procedural complaints: technical side & timelines. Are meetings being held without prior notice?

Ways to make a complaint: 

Formal and informal complaints are best made when following the chain of communication.

Informal complaints: The easiest way to solve the complaint is to hold an IEP review meeting.

Formal complaints: may have a few different outcomes depending on whether an agreement can be made. Often there is a Facilitated IEP meeting when making a formal complaint. This has somebody at the meeting who is not part of the IEP team. Each person is bringing their data and the 3rd party is running the IEP meeting to make sure everyone is feeling heard. 

Occasionally, mediation is needed with formal complaints. When both parties cannot come to an agreement and mediation is called, it must be agreed to by both parties. During mediation, we can “bend” the law in writing. For example, if a student is sick and cannot attend school but the school feels like they should be at school so the school can provide them with the education they are required to provide. During mediation, you could get in writing that it is ok for the child to miss school and the school will not be held responsible for what is missed during their extended absence.

Once you have put in a complaint (formal/informal) there must be a review meeting within 15 days and a decision has to be made within 45 school days. From there you can also follow an appeal process. If something goes to a court case (hearing), you cannot bring an advocate. The advocate can prepare you for the hearing with your data, but a lawyer will know the law and go to court with you. Once a decision is made, the advocate can help facilitate and help shape the educational program that may be needed at that time.

If you choose to bring an advocate to the IEP meetings, facilitated IEP meetings, IEP reviews, or mediation you do not have to tell them if you are bringing them, but it is nice to let them know so they can feel prepared. If you are bringing a lawyer, you do have to let them know before the meeting, so they have the chance to bring theirs if they want to.

There is not a process for things outside of Due Process. For example, complaining about feeling like a teacher doesn’t like the student.  

Policies and Laws: 

Procedural Safe Guards (policies, procedures, laws, etc). You can get this at the state department of education. Things included may be a notice of meeting in writing. All of this is included as part of the IDEA law.

There must also be parent training centers to get federal funding. This may be called different things in different states. Parents may not always know these things exist, but it is for parents and professionals. Google Parent Information Center to find the one for your state. You can get various supports from these centers such as interpreters and workshops to help you learn your basic rights and more.  


next steps: Make sure you are following me on instagram and/or tiktok. I am regularly posting content to help you as you continue your journey in confidently advocating for your child in a way that is positive and collaborative with the school. 

I'd also love if you would continue to share about who’s learning now with your friends and family who may be needing support for their children when navigating their special education journey.

last but not least, if you have time, could you please provide some feedback for the book club workshop? I'd love to know your biggest takeaways, anything I could do to improve this workshop, as well as any workshops you'd love to see in the future. 

Thank you for attending week 5 of our book club!

We'd love your feedback!

week 4: problem solving 
& advocacy empowerment
replay & summary

This week turned out to be more of a live Q&A with some touches on procedures, school obligations, and parent rights.

Some parents had eligibility meetings or re-evaluation meetings coming up.  Procedurally, the school has deadlines to meet for evaluating your child, but when the evaluation is done, this is not the end all be all. If the school asks for a meeting on a certain date, you do have the right to request a new date and time if it does not work with your schedule.

The group discussed that students will often be evaluated based on effective progress, but that area has a lot of grey area, but overall, keep a log and records of data to support you and your child at your meetings. While a student may be progressing, are they progressing at the same rate of their peers? Is their progress due to the supports and services that are already in place for your child? As always, keep data and ask for data!

Parents questioned whether it was within their rights to ask that a certain individual not do the testing for their child. Unfortunately, that is not, however, there are some things you can do. If you have a relationship with certain members of the child’s IEP team, you can ask them in person whether they would be available for testing and/or discuss how there is possibly a personality conflict with your child and the test administrator.  This may/may not result in a different evaluator, but if you ask in writing, it will almost always be declined due to the school needing to protect themselves.   If it is verbally agreed that a certain person will facilitate the testing, then you can send a confirmation email that says something such as “thank you for taking the time to speak with me about my child’s upcoming evaluation. If I understand correctly, X will be facilitating their testing, is that correct?”


some parents wondered what to do if they did not have old records from their child’s previous school years, but now recognize there may have been information on those records that would help give data to the iep team when making their decision and/or building accommodations. the great news is that you can always ask for your child’s records and receive them. it is important to note that the school does not have to comply within a certain time table.

debbie also pointed out that the data you are collecting at home and throughout your child’s education experience could be organized on this free progress grid.

parents had questions on whether a student’s disability will make it so they would not receive consequences from the school such as in school suspension.  debbie discussed how if noted, certain limitations of their disability would allow for a different intervention for the child. for example, if a child said something that was inappropriate, is it noted that their disability hinders their ability to know that what they said was not appropriate (especially if others are saying it).

some parents questions whether anxiety could be a reason for an iep or accommodations. the answer is again a grey area, but if we have data to support it, then absolutely.

the group discussed their takeaways so far from the book club and overall found great value. the group loved hearing from other members and their experiences with their own children. the group also loved the idea of having a dad (or partner) workshop to discuss how to best to support the parent who is spearheading the IEP meetings and coordination with the school.

finally, the group also decided on a bonus week!  this will be held tuesday, november 15, 2022 at 7 pm est.
Thank you for attending week 4 of our book club!

We'd love your feedback!

Week 3: System Empowerment
Replay & Summary

This week we talked about: the IEP team members, Cycle of the eligibility flow chart, and an IEP vs a 504.

The IEP TEAM: not a dictatorship! Everybody has value and importance. Each person sees your child from a different lens. The required participants are the parent, general ed teacher, special ed teacher, and administrator. If there are specialists your child sees, you will want them at the meeting as well.  If someone is unable to attend the meeting, you can cancel it and reschedule!  You want that person's input, so don't shy away from rescheduling. Use this IEP Contact List to keep track of all the team member's contact information. 

Parent experiences: have had a mix of support and collaboration as well as struggles. The team sometimes seems to look at what is best for them vs what is best for their child. Positive experiences could also have been a little overwhelming. Team members may have been at the meeting, but the parents didn’t have a relationship with them and didn't know they had a working relationship with their child. Struggles may have been addressed that he parent wasn't aware of. 
 
At the meeting: Each person comes with data from different areas including: standardized, observational, and curriculum.

Parent can bring their own data. Use the Parent Input Statement as a guide as you interview your child, note your personal observations and lean in to your parent gut!  Listen to this podcast to hear more on developing your statement. 

Ideas of data parents can collect: Observations such as meltdowns during homework. You may notices 20 out of 30 nights there are meltdowns. Or you may notice continued struggles with reading, etc. Bring these observations to the meeting. 

*Note: The school doesn’t have to honor the issues at home if it doesn’t happen at school, but can we show it is exasperated by school and see if there are things we can do to adjust.

You should get progress reports on the IEP goals the same time as report cards. Please note that creating progress reports is a lot of work for teachers and when they fill them out, there are just drop downs to say YES or NO on whether a student is on track with their goals.  
If they don’t have time to type in specific notes, don’t feel shy from emailing the teacher to get the details on their answer. Questions you can use include: What do you use in the classroom to assess this data? Can you send me the curriculum-based data?  You can track the data you receive in this Progress Grid. By using a system such as a progress grid, you are able to re-evaluate the goals. Have they stayed the same through the years? If so, maybe we need to adjust them. You can also see whether a goal seems to still be relevant.

It is very helpful for parents to create a binder or system to keep all of your child's data together.  This includes emails, notes, progress reports, report cards, etc. Bring this to the meetings with you. 

If you feel like things aren’t going well or you just don't feel right about something, you can call an IEP team meeting at any moment.

Eligibility flow chart/SPED cycle: Special Education is covered under the IDEA Law and includes 13 disability. Having a medical disability does not mean your child has an educational disability and they may not need specialized instruction. Therefore, your child may not qualify for an IEP based on a disability alone. 

To determine eligibility, your school should do a full evaluation of your child. This will help the school get an idea on whether your child is making effective progress. This effective progress does not have to do with academics alone. A child may have good grades, but still need an IEP or 504 accommodations. These supports or services may be around behavior, social skills, coping strategies, and more. 

IEPs: are covered under the IDEA Law and are goal oriented. An IEP is used to change the curriculum to help your child access it.

504s: are covered under the American Disabilities Act. 504s allow for accommodations that affect how a student accesses the curriculum.

Page 124 in the book goes over more detail about IEPs and 504s. Another great resource for further education is Understood.org. Parents and professionals use this site to get a variety of information regarding disabilities, accommodations and more. This article goes in to further detail about the differences between an IEP and 504

Thank you for attending week 3 of our book club!

We'd love your feedback!

Week 2: Student Empowerment
Replay & Summary

Today we talked about the Learning Strengths Inventory!  If you haven't taken it yet for yourself and your child, you can head here to do it! 

Some people may feel that Learning Styles are not valid, but often that may be because it is overused or they feel that a person may not ever get away from the primary learning style. Ideally, a person will learn all 4 learning styles and adapt to them, but we generally lead with a certain one when taking in new information.

Debbie went in to detail on the various Learning Styles and the Learning Strengths and how people use their strengths with the various styles. You can learn more about them starting on page 134.

If you want to learn more, you can also listen to this podcast episode!
After you gather this information about your child, you can use it as you fill out the Present Levels form to bring to your child's next Parent Teacher Conference or IEP meeting. Remember to interview and get your child's input as you fill out the form.  

You can work together with your child's teacher and team to use your child's learning styles and strengths to support their learning. 

It would be great to have this as an electronic copy as well so you can share it with your child's teacher and IEP team. 

Remember it's ok to bring your concerns, but not all of them will be addressed at school. Some will need to be addressed outside of school. You still want to bring them up because there is a possibility the school can help meet your child where they are at and support them at school. 

Not sure what accommodations are available? Here is a great list!

Thank you for attending week 2 of our book club!

We'd love your feedback!

Week 1: Parent Empowerment
Replay & Summary

This week we learned where each of the parents are at. Where they are in the journey and the basics about their personal experiences with the school and their child.

Most parents felt it took too much time and effort to get the school to do the evaluation. After the evaluation, they didn’t know what to do next. Parents felt underprepared to meet with the school after the evaluation and didn’t know what to do with the information they were given.

Parents didn’t feel like they knew what to ask for from the school and didn’t feel confident about the decisions that were made for their child. They don’t know if what was put in place is enough or is being followed.

Parents have seen that their child’s needs have changed from year to year and though some challenges have been addressed, new ones are now uncovered. They are now trying to figure out what to do next.

We learned about the different stages parents might find themselves in when navigating the special education journey. Most parents felt as though they shift in and out of stages depending on what is happening at the time. You may feel frustrated and curious at the same time. That’s ok!
We learned OUR job as parents is not to get a master’s in special education. It is to present our whole child because we know them best. We were encouraged to use the Present Levels form to present our child in the best way to the team. If you aren’t feeling prepared, use the IEP Checklist and interview your child. Ask them questions about what they like and don’t like. Ask them questions about what they would change about school if they could. Present that to the team along with any concerns you may have.

We also learned that we don’t have to just accept everything on the IEP if it doesn’t feel right for our child. We need to nurture their dreams. If their plan isn’t nurturing their dream, it doesn’t have to be that way. We can use our children’s interests to motivate them! Our students don’t have to miss out on subjects they love for 100% academic focus. We also don’t need to hold our children back in areas such as math for example, if their dream includes something that would heavily include math.

Next week we are talking about Student Empowerment! Take the Learning Strengths inventory to learn more about yourself and your child. Get ready to bring that information to next week so we can discuss what you feel comfortable sharing.   

Thank you for attending week 1 of our book club!

We'd love your feedback!

By using this site, you agree to the Terms & Privacy Policy.